tales from an ordinary world

2003-01-21

This curious change in timing - I'm still adjusting to the advantages, hoping I'll be able to do something useful with the extra time. Mostly, though, I'm just not quite sure what to do with myself. It almost feels like a kind of rehearsal for retirement. I can feel the time falling between my fingers as I hop on another tram, stare out the window a while, order another coffee, or walk down another street. I try to ignore the inevitable guilt, the feeling that I'm not supposed to be here, that I should be chained to a desk in an office somewhere, paying the price for my frivolity. I don't want to go back.